Diary of a Wom'n

It’s been nearly a week since J and I spoke. He called me a few times and texted me this: I miss you sooooo much. He probably figures that I’m very upset with him but the truth is, the issue is between him and himself. It’s beyond my disappointment with him. The fact of the matter is, he has a childish way of dealing with situations that make him feel uncomfortable or that he doesn’t want to deal with – essentially he ignores them and hopes they disappear. Children do that; they hide under their covers and hope the monsters go away by the time they pull themselves out of their covers again. But we’re not children anymore. We’re adults and our problems aren’t going to go away simply by hiding under the covers. We have to confront them, deal with them and reject fears of disappointing or upsetting others – in other words, utilize our problem-solving skills.

I’m not upset with him for letting me down and not coming through the night I needed him, but rather making me believe I can count on him. He didn’t bother to call me to let me know about our plan; he didn’t give me the chance to ask somebody else to go with me. He just ignored me and hoped I would disappear along with my reliance on him for that night. I guess he got what he wanted. I have disappeared from his life.

GW